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September 7th, 2009
Looking Up
Good morning,
I wrote today's feature article six years ago. It was my oldest son's first day of high school. We had spent Labor Day at the beach carefree and happy and this article was the result of a lovely conversation he and I shared on the way home from the beach.
Now, he is twenty years old and is in a fire fighters program at our local community college. He has to struggle financially, but he is on a good path. He is spending this long holiday weekend helping the firefighters in L.A. He is certified in "Search and Rescue" and they called him, so he left Friday morning and should be back sometime tomorrow. Like any mom, I'm worried and proud.
Today, I am taking my other children to the beach for one last day of summer fun before they fully immerse themselves in another year of academia. I was thinking of my oldest son and how he will not be with us on this particular "last day of 'who cares'" as he has been on so many others. I don't feel too bad for him though; he learned to surf this summer and gets plenty of playtime into his normal schedule.
I just was feeling sort of reminiscent of those old days before teenagers went off to college and before toddlers went off to school. I was remembering how I cried after dropping my oldest boy off for his first day of elementary school and somehow the years flew by and now he is off living his "hero's dream".
Happy Labor Day to all of you ...and call your mothers.
take care,
Skye Thomas
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This Week's News of Interest:
All forms of the new September forecasts have been emailed, posted to the website, and/or blogged. If you have not received your copy, please send us a note telling us which mailing list you are on and which email address to look for. We will be happy to resend them out to anyone who needs it resent.
Here are the links for those of you who like to read the forecasts online...
Aries September 2009 Monthly Horoscope
Taurus September 2009 Monthly Horoscope
Gemini September 2009 Monthly Horoscope
Cancer September 2009 Monthly Horoscope
Leo September 2009 Monthly Horoscope
Virgo September 2009 Monthly Horoscope
Libra September 2009 Monthly Horoscope
Scorpio September 2009 Monthly Horoscope
Sagittarius September 2009 Monthly Horoscope
Capricorn September 2009 Monthly Horoscope
Aquarius September 2009 Monthly Horoscope
Pisces September 2009 Monthly Horoscope
Quote of the Week:
The Golden Rule of Parenting is; Do unto your children as you wish your parents had
done unto you! -
Phrases and their actual meanings: "My teacher has never liked me." Expect a phone
call before lunch from the teacher informing you that your child has been launching
hot dogs by compressing them inside a small Thermos and then removing the lid quickly.
-
Like its politicians and its war, society has the teenagers it deserves. -
Feature Article of the Week:
The Last Day of 'Who Cares?'
Yesterday was the last day of 'Who Cares?' for my oldest child. Today is his first
day of high school. From now on, his choices will have a long-
Our culture does not make a big deal of that moment when a teen is officially considered an adult. Many older more traditional cultures create ceremonies so the teen and everyone around him knows that from that day forward he is considered an adult and is expected to behave as such. By the time they are old enough to move out, they have had a few years to get comfortable with the idea that they are adults. In America, we just say that at the age of eighteen you are old enough to vote, to get married, to serve your country, to go to jail, and to move out of your parent's home. There is no ceremony, no transition, no empowering.
If we are honest, we have to admit that by the time our children enter into high school, our influence has seriously dropped off. That is not to say that our love, presence, and role modeling is not still crucial. It's just that we have already taught them most of the really important stuff that we were going to teach them. We have taught them to believe in themselves, or we haven't. We have taught them about religion, or we haven't. We have taught them the Golden Rule, or we haven't. We have taught them to say no to drugs and premarital sex, or we haven't. You get the idea. By the time our children are entering into high school they know what we think of life and what we think of them. They know if our approach to life and towards them is basically optimistic or not. They know if we value higher education or not.
I told my son the truth, "From the day you walk through those doors into high school, I no longer have any real control over your life. You are in charge. If you decide to flunk out of school, there is nothing I can do about it. If you decide to blow off my rewards and punishment systems, there isn't a darn thing I can do to stop you. If you blow your grades, all I can do is deny you driving privileges. Legally, I don't have to let you drive. Otherwise, I can't really do much to force you to be a good student. I cannot force you to stay clean and sober. I cannot force you to surround yourself with quality people.
You stand four inches taller than me and weigh as much as I do. What am I going
to do? Spank you? Put you in time-
Up until now, nobody really cared what kind of grades you got. The grades you get now affect whether or not you get into a college. The grades you get now affect whether or not you get scholarship money. Whether or not you join in student government, compete in sports, participate in the arts, it all matters now. The grades you get and the activities you choose to participate in now affect your placement in society when that eighteenth birthday hits.
Will you be a high school dropout or will you be going away to the school of your choice entering into a field of study that fascinates you? Will there be scholarship money to pay for your schooling or will you be forced to struggle and work your way through school? The grades you get now affect how hard will you have to work in the future. The better your grades, the more activities you excel in, and the longer you stay in school, the easier you will have it later.
From this day forward, you are in charge of your destiny. You decide. How much paid vacation do you want as an adult? How many nice toys will you be able to purchase? How nice of a place will you live in? How important are expensive clothes to you? How many hours per week will you want to work to support your children? Will you travel? Will you love your job? You actually have the power now to start choosing for yourself and designing for yourself what your future will look like. You do not have the freedoms nor the responsibilities of an adult yet, but you do have the power to create your own dreams. That means that from this point forward you are secretly in charge of your future
As a toddler, I taught you society's opinions of right and wrong. As a child, I taught you the laws of cause and effect. Throughout the process, I did my best to help you find your unique and beautiful authentic self. You are not legally free to leave and do as you please, but you are now at that point where I have to teach you how to create a life for yourself that is meaningful and worthy of you and your incredible heart. From this day forward, you get to choose your soul's journey.
Yesterday, you played at the beach as a carefree child. Today, you began your journey into adulthood. From this point forward people are watching, they care about your work ethic, your personal conduct, who you surround yourself with, and who you have chosen to become. You have four years to design and build your wings. They will carry you when you leave the nest. Choose wisely, my dear.
Who cares? You do."
Need someone to talk to about life's challenges? Skye Thomas is available for life coaching.
Copyright 2003, Skye Thomas, Tomorrow's Edge
Tomorrow's Edge
...inspiring leaps of faith
Books, articles, newsletters,
life coaching, & horoscopes.
Skye Thomas is the CEO of Tomorrow’s Edge, an Internet leader in inspiring leaps
of faith. She became a writer in 1999 after twenty years of studying personal growth,
motivation, soulmates, self-
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