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answers these questions
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40 of Skye Thomas’ most popular articles have been brought together to create this magical book. Give it as a gift to someone going through a rough time to show them
Find Your Heart’s Song and Sing Louder!
that you can rely on to always be there like a good friend ready to cheer you up on a cloudy day.
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negative self-
How can I conquer my negativity and become a naturally positive person?
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Halloween Goodies in our Tomorrow’s Edge
Long Live the American Dream! We help you to re-
May 8th, 2006
Love’s Dance
Good Morning,
Things got pretty busy around here this week. My daughter finished up her school play and is now an official Thespian of her High School and my son found out that he earned a Letter for his participation on the Speech and Debate Team too. In addition to these activities, I was interviewed for a storytellers group and we gave two of the websites fresh makeovers. Check out the new looks at www.TomorrowsEdge.net and www.TomorrowsEdge.com.
Hope you all have a wonderful time this week and don’t forget to tell someone special that you love them.
take care,
Skye Thomas
Tomorrow's Edge
...inspiring leaps of faith
Long Live the American Dream!
Quote of the Week:
"You can discover more about a person in an hour of play than in a year of conversation." – Plato, Philosopher
"You aren't wealthy until you have something money can't buy." –Garth Brooks
Immature love says: 'I love you because I need you.' Mature love says 'I need you because I love you.' – Erich Fromm
Also Added to the Website this Week:
Storytellers Interviewed Skye Thomas
Aneeta Sundararaj of the “Great Storytelling Network” interviewed Skye Thomas this week. The interview is both charming and informative.
Inspirational Website and Motivational Website
We gave both of the main websites a makeover this week. You should find they are easier to navigate and a bit more attractive too. Yes, we meant to use some of those bizarre colors!
Feature Article of the Week:
What Does “I Love You” Mean?
It’s not enough to tell someone you love them on a regular basis if there’s no passion and fire behind the statement. We often say the words, “I love you” without really feeling the meaning of them. Yeah we know the words mean, ”You matter to me… I care about what happens to you…. I think you’re pretty cool.” But there’s so much more to it then that. When we are first falling in love, we think about the ideas of what that means. We analyze the relationship and each other. We really look at what’s developing and we evaluate whether or not it’s safe to say those three little words. It’s a big deal to make the decision to say it to someone else. How will they receive it? Do they feel the same way? Will they say, “I love you, too” or will they mumble something about having a meeting they forgot about? After the relationship is going along successfully, we forget to really think about what it means to still be saying, “I love you” to the other person.
Here’s an exercise for you that should help you rediscover what it means to say those words to someone. Think about tone and voice inflection. You can change the meaning of a sentence by which word you give extra punch to. “I love you” is different from “I love you” which is also different from “I love you.” Let’s look at each version separately.
When we say it as “I love you” one is reminded of when someone is depressed and thinks that nobody cares about them. We let the person know they are wrong by letting them know we want to be seen as the exception to that belief system. But take it a step further…. Who are you? What does it mean when YOU are the one saying that you love someone else. What does that entail? Who exactly is loving them?
When we say it as “I love you” then it means more then just “I like you” or “I want you” or “I admire you.” What does the word love mean to you? Are you using the right word? Maybe you really should be saying “I care about you” or “I love how I feel when I’m around you” or “I think you’re amazing.” Sometimes we just cluster a whole bunch of positive emotions together and put them under the umbrella word – love. So take some time and think about what that word means to you and how it is used.
When we say it as “I love you,” what comes to mind is someone being accused of wanting someone else and they adamantly reply, “No! I love YOU!” For this portion of the exercise, think about who it is you say those words to. Who are they really? Are they the same person today as they were when you first started saying it? If you met them on the street for the first time today, as they are now, would you still fall in love with them all over again? Do you still see them for who and what they are deep down inside or are you just saying the words to a memory of who they were when you first met them?
Finally, blend all of these concepts together in your mind. When you tell your partner that you love them, what is it you’re saying in it’s biggest fullest sense? Now write it all down. “I love you means….” You may only have one or two sentences or you may have pages and pages of words describing what it means for you to love that person. It’s not important how much you’ve written, but that you have now reconnected yourself with the root of what it is the words “I love you” means to you. When you say it to your partner, you will say it with real passion and fire again because the meaning will be fresh in your mind. You won’t be simply repeating it on autopilot like so many of us do. Perhaps you’ll add a passionate kiss and even tell them about this exercise and what came to mind as you contemplated what it means to love them.
You could even ask your partner, “So tell me, what does it mean to you when you say the words, ‘I love you’ to me?” Give them time to think through their answers. Don’t pressure them. It’s a lot like the first time you tell someone that you love them…. you still have to put yourself out there and wait for the honest openhearted response that they give you. Just like with a new relationship, you can’t yell at them for not responding correctly or start nagging about how they ought to be more in touch with their feelings – especially their feelings about you. Perhaps it would be better to agree that you will each take pen and paper and spend some time alone thinking through what you would like to say to the other. Maybe you’re both open enough to sit cuddled together on the sofa and share the free flowing thoughts that come to mind as you contemplate together what “I love you” means to you at this stage of your life together. The worst thing you can do is make it like a pop quiz in school where your partner feels like a big fight is going to occur if they don’t answer it correctly and in a timely manner.
Another idea you could try is to write out your own thoughts about what it means to love your partner in your best handwriting and leave it for them as a love letter somewhere that you’re sure they’ll find it. Even if they don’t do the same for you, you may still find a deeper more meaningful response from them the next time you tell them those three magical words.
Copyright 2004, Skye Thomas, Tomorrow’s Edge
Tomorrow's Edge
...inspiring leaps of faith
Long Live the American Dream!
Skye Thomas is the CEO of Tomorrow’s Edge, an Internet leader in inspiring leaps
of faith. She became a writer in 1999 after twenty years of studying personal growth,
motivation, soulmates, self-
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